"...And no book long enough to satisfy"

"I am a product of endless books. My father bought all the books he read and never got rid of any of them. There were books in the study, books in the drawing room, books in the cloakroom, books (two deep) in the great bookcase on the landing, books in a bedroom, books piled as high as my shoulder in the cistern attic, books of all kinds reflecting every transient stage of my parents' interest, books readable and unreadable, books suitable for a child and books most emphatically not. Nothing was forbidden me. In the seemingly endless rainy afternoons I took volume after volume from the shelves. I had always the same certainty of finding a book that was new to me as a man who walks into a field has of finding a new blade of grass."
— C.S. Lewis

Hymn

If I flee from greenest pastures, would you leave to look for me?
Forfeit glory to come after, 'till I only dwell in Thee.

Attn:

"Don't look for me at the zoo, because I'm not there."

BDE (Best Day Ever)

Reasons why today is a good day:

1) Carrie Peterson will be on staff at FMMC next year.
2) I will be a third year at FMMC next year.
3) The first two statements put together make me really really happy.
4) I got a zebra Snuggie in the mail today. Be jealous.

I wish Hogwarts was real.

"You don’t need magic to disappear. All you need is a destination."

Want vs. Need

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want." -- Psalm 23:1

As much as I want, God knows what I need.

In the eye of the beholder.

I'm watching a little girl who has no legs play baseball in her gym class right now. It's beautiful.

Today.

A deaf man called me fat and ugly today. I cried. It got me thinking, if an old deaf man doesn't think I'm attractive, then there's no hope for me. Also, I got an estimate on my car today...it's going to cost $2,300 to get it fixed. Today was good.


Starbucks, I need you.

Everything you want...

I was sitting in church this morning and instead of listening to Pastor Todd, I wrote this list down:

1) I want to spend a summer in Maine.
2) I want to travel West (California, Arizona, Oregon, Washington...but mostly just California).
3) I want to go to photography school.
4) I want to travel to all 50 states and go to the capital city of each.
5) Not only do I want to travel the US, but also Internationally (Israel, Greece, Italy--Vatican City!, Australia, Ireland...etc.)
6) I want to marry a man who makes me laugh more than cry (ha!), who loves God more than he loves me, who supports me and the dreams I have, who makes me a better person, and who makes my birthday presents instead of buying them.
7) I want children. I don't care how many or even if I adopt. I just want children.
8) I want a golden retriever and I want to name him Kevin.
9) Eventually, I want a Cannon Mark 2.
10) I want a house with a wrap around porch so I can sit in a rocking chair, read, and drink lemonade on summer days.
11) I want to see U2 perform "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" live and Phil Collins perfom 'Easy Lover'.
12) I want to learn how to cook.
13) I want a room in my house to be dedicated to books (lots of them!!), reading, and prayer. I want there to be a fireplace in it, too.
14) I want to be an encourager of people's dreams and push them to pursue them!
15) I want the ability to endure.
16) I want to read Sam Walton's, Marilyn Manson's and John F. Kennedy's autobiographies.
17) I want to be faithful in the small things.
18) I want to meet James Franco.
19) I want to go to Disney World.
20) I want my children to know that they're loved, beautiful, and precious in my eyes (and God's!).
21) I want to be teachable in every area of my life.
22) I want God to use me to change people's lives (that's one I had a hard time writing down. I want it, but I don't feel worthy to be used. But then I remembered how dumb I am).
23) I want to see a soccer match IN Europe.
24) I never want to stop collecting sunglasses.
25) I want to plant a garden...and find a way to keep it alive.
26) I have a few more. Big ones. But I'm not ready to let those out yet. Maybe one day soon :)

As I was thinking about all of this, I thanked God for putting all of these desires in my heart, because they make me really happy and excited for the future. And then I heard, "Would you be willing to give all of these hopes and dreams up for Me?" Crap. No. I mean, yes God...I would. Right? It would be a struggle, as I would really like to get married, have kids, see one of my favorite songs ever performed LIVE!, change lives, travel, take pictures...but even more than my dreams, I decided that I want my God.


Dear James...if I don't ever meet you, I'll be okay with that. I guess.

Never think you're nothing.

Have you ever just wanted to get hit on by strangers just to feel good about yourself? I do. Especially tonight. I just wanted for someone...anyone, to tell me that I was beautiful. I guess it's kind of sad, but it was my only desire for the night. Out of all of the people at the beach tonight not ONE thought I was pretty? Not even the drunk ones. But I have a friend who helped me out with this. He said to me, "Don't ever try and find your worth in other people, especially drunk men at the beach. Find it in Jesus. I see beauty written all over you, Val..." There was more, but I can't do it justice. It brought me to tears. Thank you, Charlie. It gave me hope.

Actually, I CAN.

Today I was cleaning a lady's house in Cape Coral and she asked me what I wanted me to do with my life. Lately I've been hesitant to let people in on my dreams, but I decided to be vulnerable and Just.Do.It (thank you, Carrie Peterson). So I told her, "After Master's I think I'm going to go to photography school." You want to know what she said? "Oh baby, you shouldn't do that. You won't be able to pay the bills unless you're like that lady who takes half naked pictures of people. But let's be honest, that probably won't happen." Awesome.

The Best Way Out Is Always Through

^^her photos are perfect.

When You're Gone, All The Colors Fade...

Life Is A Highway (And I'm Gonna Ride It)

"You were born to shine"